Marriage Assassins (Part 3)

“Give your burdens to the Lord, and he will take care of you. He will not permit the godly to slip and fall.” Psalms 55:22 

The sixth assassin that will destroy your marriage is promiscuity. In other words, loose morals. The problem in our nation today, and why half of all marriages end in divorce, is that we have a generation of men and women who are experimenting with sex before they ever get married. Media and modern society paint inappropriate and secretive sexual relations as exciting and sexy. But God didn’t make your marriage to compete with an affair. It may look exciting because she’s dressed up for you, or he’s looking sharp at the moment. But remember, they are showing you their best self, but if you were living with that same person like you’re living with your wife or your husband, you would see them for who they are, and that may not be so appealing! If you want to have an affair, have it with your spouse. Get away and go somewhere new! Go anywhere! You can work on what you already have, and it will last you a lot longer than finding something new! Promiscuity, pornography, and the lusts of the flesh will take you down a path that has a price you won’t want to pay. If you start allowing these things to dominate your mind before you know it, your desire will be turned off for your own mate, and you’ll look to someone else. That’s the enemy’s plot in many of your lives. 

Number seven is plain old stress; arguing about things. Both of you may be under pressure just trying to meet your obligations each day. Stress can keep building and building. Sometimes you need to go back to the realization that you loved each other before you had anything. So why would you let these material things pull you apart? Don’t let that stuff affect your relationship. Say “no” to more things if they are causing unnecessary headaches. The good can become the enemy of the best in life if you let it. 

The eighth assassin is economic pressure. Bills, debts, and money problems can quickly deteriorate a marriage. When you have no plan or budget, you tend to blame the other person because you don’t know where the money is going every month. Sit down together and make a plan ahead of time on how you will spend your money. Let your partner have an equal say in the decisions even if they don’t work. They may be staying home, raising the children, and maintaining the house, and that is a position that deserves honor and respect. Couples get baited into thinking they have to keep up with what everyone else has. You may think you have to have a four-bedroom home, but you won’t need a four-bedroom home if that money is more important to you than your spouse; you’ll need a one-bedroom apartment! Money isn’t everything!  

The ninth assassin is called incompatibility. Many couples get to a place in their life where they don’t feel like they have anything in common. Well, you know what you do in those situations? You get something in common! You start developing some things that you want to do together. You start hiking, playing pickleball, gardening, exploring new cities, or whatever you can come up with. When you were dating, you were probably more than willing to do activities that you didn’t like simply to be with them. So go back to that frame of mind.

Lastly, number ten, outside interferences have the potential to assassinate your marriage. You will always have relatives or friends who will tell you, “I wouldn’t put up with this,” or “You can do better.” The Bible says, “Blessed is the man that walks not in the counsel of the ungodly.” (Psalm 1:1) If you have a major issue with your partner, the first one you should go to is God. Take it to Him in prayer. Lay it at His feet. Filter it through the word of God and see how God wants you to see things. Second, go to your partner and talk to them. There should not be a third person in your relationship, even if it is your mother, sister, cousin or friend. There may be seasons when you both need to meet up with a Christian counselor or pastor, and that can be helpful in difficult times, but other than that, you should not be allowing an outside person to influence your marriage. 

Pray this little prayer today. “Lord, please release your blood and protection over my household. Please give me the wisdom to avoid being selfish, immature, and manipulative. Please help me to have realistic expectations and a committed heart. Please help me to avoid the lure of unfaithfulness. Please keep my eyes away from things that feed the lust of the flesh. Please help me never to allow stress, money, incompatibility, or outside people to tear me away from the partner you have given me. In Jesus’ mighty name. Amen.”

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